Graphing Life
tyleroakley:

timmyturntner:

American Horror Story: Coven

American Horror Story: Oven

tyleroakley:

timmyturntner:

American Horror Story: Coven

American Horror Story: Oven

rare-basement:

the most realistic friendship scene i have ever seen in a movie

dumping my old [meta] okcupid profile here!

this is an amazing profile. Too bad not too effective 

My self-summary
[generic, yet genuine (of course!), blurb about how I’m super unique, full of mirth, and generally curious about the world. Phrases to use here include:
- living life to the fullest
- work hard play hard
- love the bay area
- adventurous foodie.
- love to travel, preferably inspired by a trip to Machu Picchu.
- passion passion passion!]
What I’m doing with my life
[this is a good place to use words like ‘passion,’ ‘change the world,’ ‘intense,’ ‘10x,’ ‘awesome,’ etc. But be sure to sprinkle in something about work-life balance.]
I’m really good at
[list something quirky and useless here, doing something ‘from scratch’ seems really popular. As if we live in a society where doing something from scratch qualifies one for the ‘depth’ badge of life, or something. ]
The first things people usually notice about me
[something about height or ethnicity, or if you’re feeling self conscious, something about ‘your deep voice’]
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
[Books: go for something with mass nerdtastic appeal, this is SF, hope you’ve brought your college syllabus.]
[Movies: just list all the recently nominated oscar films. Did Beast of the Southern Wild change your life? of course it did. No one has seen it so they can’t judge. Plus, name a couple of obscure Coen Bros movies too. Wes Andersen - very necessary. ]
[Shows: https://twitter.com/#!/OkcLovesTheWire ]
[Music: everyone loves bon iver and u2.]
[Food: college educated chickens only]
The six things I could never do without
1. [something profound but meaningless in the US, like ‘freedom’ or ‘family’]
2. [a snooty kitchen appliance/tool, like ‘microplane’]
3. [a relic from the industrial revolution era, like ‘typewriter’ or ‘knitting needles’]
4. [a steve jobs consumer electronic product.]
5. [a bougie publication, economist works well, so does new yorker.]
6. [something everyone else also cannot live without, like air, or fresh water. The great outdoors.]
I spend a lot of time thinking about
[ copy and paste the lyrics to “rainbow connection.” ]
On a typical Friday night I am
[ consider the following phrases, regardless of truth:
- a night out with the friends,
- dancing the night away,
- having a blast at my neighborhood pub,
- checking out a new band!]
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
[okc’s equivalent of ‘what’s your biggest shortcoming?’ try saying ‘i’m too modest,’ or ‘i care too much.’ - a thinly veiled humblebrag never hurts. ‘i cried during Rats of NIMH’ will surely get you laid.]
I’m looking for
  • Straight guys only
  • Ages 30–38
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends
You should message me if
[insert final filter for unique and utterly, tear-jerkingly ah-mazing snow flake

A list of medications that would disqualify applicants. ]